What if Rubiks cubes were the puzzle boxes from Hellraiser? What if iPods became self-aware? What if Jean Claude van Damme made a TV series about a flatulent, crime fighting cat? What if every household was run like Big Brother? What does any of this have to do with Mz Ann Thropik and their debut album? Nothing, but…

What if Siouxsie and the Banshees, after releasing The Scream, decided to follow a faster, heavier path to complement their dark and ethereal music? What if Babes In Toyland never disbanded, but became a more coherent and accessible, yet equally angry, musical force? What if Marilyn Manson never became totally self-indulgent and still had the vitality and passion of his first album? What if Ministry evolved to create a more harmonious, pulse pounding sound, rather the unrelenting, aural barrage of their final albums? Would any these sound like the new album from Mz Ann Thropik? Or would, in some way, all of them?

S.O.S. is a rollercoaster ride through wonderland. It starts slowly, with distress calls from fans and a short, atmospheric remix; before lurching from John Woo style smoothness and brutality, to Ray Harryhausen like jumpy excitement, to Tobe Hooper anger and pain, to David Lynch love and desire, to songs for films that have never been made. Mz Ann Thropik have never been a band to hold anything back, and they let it all flow on 17 tracks that could be the soundtrack to their lives. If there was a soundtrack to my life, it would more like Woody Allen and star a less amusing version of Hugh Grant. I’m glad I can escape my own movie and spend a little time in world of Mz Ann Thropik.