World Beard Day @ The GovernorHindmarsh, Adelaide (04/09/10)

Tue 7th Sep, 2010 in Gig Reviews

World Beard Day is a hoax. By the time Adelaide favourites The Beards dropped this bombshell, however, the crowd at the Gov was far past caring, buoyed by a shared love of facial hair and disparate music styles. Whether technically a worldwide ‘day’ or otherwise, Adelaide has its fair share of bearded musicians, and creating a gig around such a theme is the perfect way to bring them together. To guide the audience from one hairy experience to the next was MC and local comedian Mike Klimczak, who warmed up the crowd with unrelenting displays of beardism and audacious stolen kisses.

On a day when even the manliest men might have turned for shelter from the fierce weather without seeming faint-hearted, The Bearded Gypsy Band brought the Gov alive and banished the cold, welcoming the steady trickle of bedraggled punters into an atmospheric gypsy-jazz blend of sunlit emotion. Intricately played guitar complemented the moody violin, which before long brought several up-front fans into a feverish dance and set even the more inhibited crowd nodding along. Purely instrumental (save the occasional rolled ‘rumba’ from the crowd), the bashful talent of these young musicians is a delight to witness.

Next up in the eclectic melange of a line up was dapper a cappella foursome The Fishbowl Boys, who put the (fake) beard in the barbershop quartet. Their announcement that they were to cover not one but three Simon and Garfunkel tunes filled me with equal parts trepidation and anticipation, and while I’m not sure that “sail on bearded girl” is quite so romantic as the original, hearing Mrs Robinson, The 59th Bridge St Song and Bridge Over Troubled Water combined into one was a novel experience. Not getting waylaid by a slightly amusing scene where the lead vocalist stepped on his microphone cord, pulling it out and leaving him with nothing, the quartet then dived into a crowd-pleasing rendition of Oops I Did It Again. Incidentally, if anyone is in any doubt as to whether boy band moves go with teen-girl tunes, then let me assure you that it is not to be attempted without expert instruction.

Adam Page is a beardy man. He is also an incredible saxophone player and multi-instrumentalist who’s performed at the Edinburgh Fringe. Layered loops of hot pink miniature guitar strings under a toylike melodica does not inspire in one images of Indian summers, but add in tiers of rippling vocals and you’ve got something surprisingly close. I could feel my mind struggling to reconcile the contradictory messages from my eyes and my ears; the image of a bald and beardy man with his hands in the air, hip-hop style, was incongruous with the knowledge that what was producing this sound was a variety of miniature instruments. Perhaps because of the absurdity of what was being presented, the swollen crowd was beaming before long and the upbeat tunes extended a blanket of camaraderie against the storms outside. Not content to simply wear his beard, Adam Page enchanted the already devoted crowd when he began to play his beard. I wouldn’t hold it against you if you didn’t believe me, but rubbing a mic against a beard never sounded so good. By this point, I was beginning to suspect that the artists on this line up are rather well-respected musicians in their own right, and that the beard-theme was an opportunity to entertain and let loose.

After an interlude in which the competition for Beardiest Woman was judged, A French Butler Called Smith brought all the colourful summer from their Gold Coast home. Though it was difficult to tear my eyes from the outrageously loud and large tie worn by trombone player-come-vocalist, I managed to appraise the impact of this Latin-infused instrumental outfit upon what must have been nearly sold-out crowd. In a word, the band (who appeared sans any apparent French butler) was energising. More than once I heard the phrase ‘just like Womadelaide’, and the free-for-all sentiment was certainly present up front, while onlookers toward the back remained all-eyes-on-the-band. Though there were no standout moments for this reviewer, the crowd’s satisfaction was evident, and the ebullient vibe continued to reign supreme.

After heading to the front bar for a seat unfindable in the packed venue, I returned in time to see the tail end of the Best Bearded Man competition won by a gentleman with a truly impressive white wizard beard. Appropriately enough, this display of manly hairiness introduced the only entirely-bearded band of the night, comic rock quartet The Beards. Perhaps because I’ve feared for my beardless dignity at their shows, or perhaps because I’ve simply not got around to it, this was my first Beards gig – and what a gig to witness. Having been prepped for beardy love all night, the crowd was all fired up and ready to go by the time the men themselves took the stage, getting the crowd participating early with A Wizard Needs a Beard (hint: according to the song, everyone needs a beard). I found it difficult to get past the comical lyrics to decipher what sort of music this might be if it weren’t entirely about facial hair, but after the first few tunes gave myself up to the ridiculousness of it all. The crowd, enthusiastic throughout, erupted at If Your Dad Doesn’t Have a Beard, You’ve Got Two Mums before subsiding to watch the projection of World Beard Day special mockumentary A Short History of Beards. The history lesson, which spanned from Zeus to Peter Griffin, preceded a well-received encore and rounded out an enjoyable show.

If I’d ever doubted that beards could bring people together, I do so no longer. From the talented and danceable Bearded Gypsy Band to the bizarre and mesmerising Adam Page, I was with the majority of the crowd in having a wonderfully hairy night in the company of diverse but consistently cheerful music. Nonetheless, in spite of all the other wonderful musicians present at World Beard Day, I think it’s safe to say that The Beards have the market cornered on songs about beards. The songs are fun Aussie rock, but I think the adoring crowd is what made this show so enjoyable: the mood of letting go and touching one another’s bearded chins is unmatchable and one rarely found, and by the end of the night the blowy and wet weather didn’t seem to matter all that much.